For husbands whose wives experience no symptoms during pregnancy’s first trimester, just know that you are among the blessed to walk this earth. This period of time has the potential to be the most difficult for couples to adjust to. With so many changes taking place within your wife’s body, every day can bring new challenges. Hormones levels are all over the place, so you will need a great deal of patience. If you don’t have patience, get some because it will be tested and your wife will need your help and full support.
To begin, the only true portion of the term, “morning sickness” is the sickness. It can happen anytime and anywhere, so don’t be surprised if you wake up in the middle of the night to find your wife running for the bathroom. As tired as you may be, get up and see if you can help. While you cannot take on the sickness for your wife, you can sit with her, rub her back, and get her anything she may need. If she didn’t make it to the bathroom, don’t get mad, just clean up the mess. There is no telling how long or severe these nauseating symptoms will last. Some women experience only one day of mild symptoms, while others are extremely sick throughout the pregnancy. Whatever it may be, encourage your wife that it will eventually pass.
In addition to nausea, your wife may experience extreme fatigue. This means that if you are used to an active lifestyle, it may no longer be the norm now. Your wife is not getting lazy. Her energy is now being shared between two people, so those customary jogs or even the walk down the street may be replaced by crashing on the bed as soon as the work day is over. What does this mean? Most household chores now belong to you and becoming your very own version of Julia Child is a necessity.
While on the topic of food, you may be whipping up gourmet recipes, but that doesn’t mean your wife will be able to eat them. Food aversions are common and it doesn’t matter if your wife used to love chicken. Now she may not be able to be in the same room with it. Frustration is bound to occur when you have spent an hour cooking your wife’s favorite meal and she ends up eating white rice because she can’t stomach one ingredient of your masterpiece. Just remember, it is not her fault and it will return to normal at some point
Lastly, and perhaps most difficult for husbands during the first trimester, is that with all of these different symptoms combined, the opportunity for physical intimacy may decrease significantly. It will be such a contrast from when you were trying to conceive that you might begin to feel used or unloved. Know that this is not the case. Again, your wife’s body is going through so many changes and you cannot start blaming her for them. As hard as it may be, you need to bite the bullet here and put your own needs aside for hers. If you give it your full effort, you will find plenty of ways to fulfill your relationship, even without physical intimacy. Know that this is temporary and at the end, you will have a child in your arms, the morning sickness will be a thing of the past, chicken will be allowed in the house again, and the spark of intimacy will begin to return. The fatigue? Well, you will get the chance to share it with your wife when waking up every couple of hours for the first few weeks with your newborn.
